Saturday 20 August 2011

Redneck Olympics


Redneck Olympics: the main events

Here are some examples of the Redneck Olympic events:

Redneck Horseshoes Also known as Washer Pitching and Hillbilly Horseshoes and similar to the old-fashioned parlour game only featuring toilet seats.
Armpit Seranade As suggested by its name, the production of a music of sorts amplified by a microphone. Excess flesh not necessarily an advantage, as demonstrated by previous contestants.
Watermelon Seed Spitting Contest A contest popular across the United States, with varying rules all centred on distances. The rules generally applied include that professional tobacco spitters are not eligible, denture wearers must abide by the judge's decision if their teeth go further than the seed, and no pipes or straws can be used for propulsive purposes.
Bobbin’ for Pigs Feet Pickled limbs are generally used for this delightful contest, which sees contestants plunge face first into troughs of water only to re-emerge with their quarry gripped between their teeth. Those to retrieve the most feet in an allotted period of time raise a trophy of a mounted, crushed beer can.
Mudpit Belly Flop Described as the defining moment of the whole tournament, a crowd gathers round to judge who can make the biggest splash. Previously won on multiple occasions by self-proclaimed redneck grandma, Barbara Braswell.

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